From the Lighter Side of Theology
CHANGING A LIGHT BULB THE
CHRISTIAN WAY
How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?



Charismatic

Only 1
Hands are already in the air.




Pentecostal
10
One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.





Presbyterians
None
Lights will go on and off at predestined times.



Roman Catholic
None - Candles only.



Baptists
At least 15.
One to change the light bulb, and 3 committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.





Episcopalians:
3
One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.







Mormons :
5
One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.





Unitarians


We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.





Methodists
Undetermined
Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb.
Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.




Nazarene:
6
One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.





Lutherans
None
Lutherans don't believe in change.




Amish

What's a light bulb?

image AlleyOop007
NRA Life Member since 1969
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"History does not entrust the care of freedom to the weak or timid." - Dwight D. Eisenhower




Last Edited By: AlleyOop007 07/11/09 12:36 PM. Edited 1 time.